weak

So tired of scraping myself together after yesterdays massacre, only to find the battle is relentless and still rages on today. So tired of sweeping the streets with my eyes to make sure no one is listening. So tired of failing the very ones entrusted to me. So tired of even the smallest of hopes, the smallest of dreams being crushed beneath the tiniest feet, the very feet I hang those hopes and dreams on.

So tired of perfection always escaping me. Tired of pretending, tired of carrying the judgments made on me.

So tired of watching them spiral down the shifting and twisting road they didn’t choose. So tired of reaching for the light as it comes into view, only to discover it has fallen too.

So I build with my hands, that which falls apart.

So tired, I let God put me back together, only to find the He is relentless and He still rages on for me today. So tired, I let God sweep the streets with His eyes and didn’t care if anyone was listening.

So tired, I let God take my failings and entrusted them to Him. So tired, I took my broken hopes and broken dreams and hung them in His hands. So tired, I let go of perfection and believed He could be perfect for me. Tired, I stopped pretending, stopped  carrying the judgments made on me. So tired, I trusted the road would lead to Him. So tired, I lifted my eyes from the old faltering light on the ground, only to find the intrinsic and authentic light above.

So I lift my hands to that which never falls apart.

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